We all have a love story. Unfortunately, instead of harmony and romance, our stories are usually filled with villains and tales of inadequacy.
My love story used to be that relationships were hard, and that somehow the struggle meant it was more romantic and worthwhile (thanks to positive media messaging, I’m sure); but deep down I knew that I not only deserved something better – I wanted to live something better!
Which meant, I had to create a new love story. Something that aligned with my ideal relationship vision (which was nothing short of fabulous).
My new story goes something like this: Relationships and men are lovely. I enjoy and deserve a relationship that’s filled with happiness, synchronicity, respect, fun and lots of love. Relationships can be easy and when I’m in harmony, so is my relationship.
So tell me (really, I’d love to hear from you), what’s the story you’ve been telling yourself about men, love and relationships? And how does this story align with what you actually want to be living?
Far too often we feel compelled to “tell it like it is”; I commend you for wanting to tell the “truth” about how love has played out for you in the past, and possibly in the present, but I gotta tell you, you’re not doing yourself any favours.
Words matter. The stories we tell matter. They create affirmations, enforce patterns and offer momentum; they also create a filter through which we see. So ask yourself, is the story you’re repeating moving you in the direction of what you actually want to be living?
This is my call to you, to talk way less about where you’ve been and way more about where you’re going. And when you do speak about your past and your exes, choose to reframe those stories by focusing on what you liked about them and the relationships, instead of how “you were played, or how you’re afraid of commitment” or this that and the other thing.
Allow yourself to start telling the story of the kind of guy you’re excited to meet or the kind of relationship you’re looking forward to experiencing (even if you’re already in one). And whatever sex you’re interested in, speak way more about their positive aspects.
Create space and start telling the new love story you’d rather be living.
Peace, love and new love stories,