Relationship Balance: You, Me and Us

Balance is a tricky word when it comes to anything, let alone, relationships.

It's hard to grasp what balance means in this context. Is there a certain amount of time you’re supposed to spend with each other? Or only a certain amount of love you’re supposed to give?

I say, there are no rules.

“Relationship balance” will look and feel entirely different to all of us. But here's how I like to sum it up for perspective's sake:

There’s you, there’s me and there’s us. It's a trinity.

The way I view my relationship is like two circles - one for you (Jack) and one for me (Diana). And where these circles join and overlap in the middle – that’s the “us”.

This is the beautiful space where we share moments, ideas, love, laughter, decisions, chores, adventures, travel and so much more. But we also have space as individuals to have these kinds of moments on our own.

On a practical level, this is what relationship balance looks like for me:

There are activities I do with Jack, and some I do on my own.I spend time creating, relaxing, exercising and meditating alone, and, we spend time doing variations of those things together.Even when it comes to decision-making, there's time to reflect on my own and time to reflect with him.

We also have the freedom to explore interests and activities that maybe the other  person isn’t as curious about.

We balance sharing common interests and introducing new things to each other, with allowing ourselves and each other, to explore new things on our own too. We don’t have to do everything together, and we don’t have to like all the same things. In fact, the space we take apart to explore our own interests and ideas, gives us so much more to talk about and learn from one another.

There's harmony and synergy between me, you and us; they’re never disconnected or separate, and yet they are not one circle either.

This kind of relationship becomes like a soft landing place that gives you even more freedom to fly. And this trinity becomes two happy humans - and one positive relationship.

Peace, love and relationship balance,

Ask Diana

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