Photo Credit – We Heart It
I’d like to touch on a point that I think is very important when you’re getting to know someone. The idea of “putting it in your pocket.”
What does this mean? It means seeing something good or bad (ok usually in reference to something not so good), taking note of it and putting it in your pocket. I get many (many) phone calls from the ladies in my life, asking me what I think about this, that and the other thing that the guy they just started seeing, has either said, done or alluded to. Often times, the action or words in question are difficult to decipher and subject to much interpretation. And while we can come up with some pretty accurate hypothesis, we can never be too sure; and usually, the action or words in question are not blatantly wrong, but rather, confusing and/or questionable.
My answer to their question is often the same (depending on what the situation is and what the guy did); when we first start dating someone, things are not always clear because ultimately, we do not really know the person. So I say “put it in your pocket and observe”. See what more comes from this person and how his or her character reveals itself.
As women, I find that all too often, we want to categorize the man right away; and we’re usually hoping to categorize him as our life mate, future husband and basically, “the one”. This makes us vulnerable to trying to right away their wrongs in desperate hope of keeping him where we want him. On the flip side, it also keeps us on alert for the slightest sign of evil or craziness. But unless your intuition is flashing big red flags at you, the only way to know someone is to date, and date slow.
Put that questionable thing that he said or did in your pocket, get to know the person, observe his or her actions and with time, you can make an educated, unemotional decision as to whether or not this person deserves space in your life.
Peace, love and pocket placing,
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