I think this may be one of the worst plagues afflicting my sisters, the conditioning of liking the “bad boys”.
Let me begin by saying that not only do I get it, I’ve also been there myself. I understand the woes of feeling like you’re just not attracted to the nice guys that come your way; and as we’ve all come to realize, attraction is key in any romantic relationship. And I’m sure I don’t have to explain the many ways that dating these bad boys is abusive to your precious soul. So how do we break the cycle?
I am proud, happy and at peace in saying, that I have successfully recovered from this conditioning. And it happened (organically), because of the time I have taken to connect to my spiritual side. Like I’ve said before, the more you connect with your higher, spiritual self (because believe it or not, you are more than just a pretty face and body), the less room and actually the less tolerance, you will ever have for toxic relationships.
But why do we choose these types of relationships in the first place? We all have wounds – no matter how great our childhoods or lives have been; it is impossible to go through life (especially in our younger years), without being jaded by this, that or the other thing. Parents, no matter how amazing they may be, are ultimately human beings and have therefore, in one way or another (and likely unintentionally) passed on some of their bullshit to you.
So what ends up happening is that we choose certain relationships, because of our inherent need to grow and heal from our grievances (that we are often not even aware we have). Our spiritual selves are always looking to do these two things: grow and heal. But the great news is, we don’t have to default to choosing bad relationships to do this. Instead, what we need to do is build the relationship we have with ourselves, by doing things to reconnect with the innocent souls we once were. Think, meditate and get to know yourself all over again. Spend time doing activities that nurture your spirit, whatever that may be for you. The more you continue on with your spiritual journey, the more you will appreciate yourself and the more you will find yourself attracting and attracted to, those oh-so-wonderful nice guys.
So the next time you hear yourself saying, “I only like bad boys”, take that as a message that your spirit needs some attention. And be the one to give it some.
Peace, love and bye-bye bad boys,