When you find yourself faced with a tough decision, what’s the first thing you do?
If you’re like most, you’ll start on a tailspin of non-stop thinking, searching and digging for answers. Mostly because you want to make the right decision; and also, because that split energy of not knowing what to do next is just so damn uncomfortable. You want to get clear so you can finally feel calm. The thing is, it’s actually the other way around.
In order to get clear, you gotta get calm; clarity comes from calmness.
With a calm mind, there’s space to think and even more so, space to see solutions and potential. When you slow the racing of your heart and mind, and manage to create a sense of internal calmness (often that means staying off the stressful subject all together), it’s almost like there’s a veil that’s lifted, leaving you to see more clearly. In that slower pace of calmness the fog clears and you’re more receptive to inspired thoughts and ideas.
I never suggest that my clients make decisions from a place of stress, confusion or worry (unless of course, they’re in some kind of immediate danger). I insist that they find their calm first. This is the way to the clarity.
I have a few tricks up my sleeves for how I find my calm; meditating, taking baths, doing yoga or taking a walk with my husband. These are some of my favourites and they’re almost foolproof.
Being in water, whether that’s a shower or a bath almost always does it for me. Like the other day, I was contemplating a few details about my upcoming retreat, when I got a wave of stress. So I stepped away from the notes on my computer and stepped into a shower. And within a few minutes of not thinking about “what could go wrong”, I received several ideas that not only resolved my stress but also, added to my excitement! All it took was a few minutes of relaxation and giving myself permission to ease up.
It can be tempting when you feel like you’re at a crossroads to jump to the decision – and hey, if it feels inspired, then by all means go for it! But if you feel stressed, worried, confused and anxious, give yourself the gift of calmness. Slow down, take a breath and if possible, do something that takes you into a different space while you stay off the subject for a little while; then get back to it when you’re feeling closer to your center.
No matter how rushed you feel, remember, clarity comes from calmness – not the other way around.
Peace, love and finding your calm,