Are You Treating First Dates Like A Job Interview

Are you treating first dates like a job interview?

Oh Queen, I see this one far too often.

Women (and men) setting up dates like they’re taking work meetings.

• Early morning coffee dates before you start work.

• Quick 45 min lunch dates in the middle of your busy day

• Going places with bright lights, where you sit across from each other and ask each other questions to qualify whether this person deserves more than 15 minutes of your time.

Please, tell me how in the world this is supposed to help foster a feeling of connection?

WHERE IS THE ROMANCE?

At the very least, pick a spot with some dim lighting.

At the most, try an activity together, go somewhere new or somewhere that gives you the feels.

And rather than firing off your typical list of questions, relax, take a breath and simply be present.

Romantic connection or not, give yourself a chance to connect with this person, human to human.

Who is this person?

How do you feel around them?

I invite you to shift your dating perspective by trying this one simple exercise:

When you come home from each date, write down a few things you appreciated about the person, the date or the connection.

Train yourself to see the good in people and relax into the process.

This is not a race!

I get that you don’t want to waste your time.

So rather than going on a quantity of dates, focus on quality.

Get on a facetime call before agreeing to meet someone in person. And then when you do, make it count.

Go somewhere that’s conducive to connection and give yourself a chance to enjoy the experience.

How’s that for a “game plan”?

With love,

Diana